10 Things I've Learned (and am still learning) during High School

Well, as many of you realize, I graduated from my fine arts school this year. Although my plans for next year are a little complicated (if you know me personally, ask me and I'll tell you all about it. If you're just a random stranger on the internet, just take my word for it because I'm not going to tell you details.), I am essentially starting a new stage of my life next year. But, as I reflect back on my past four years of life, I've realized just how much I have learned. So, here are ten important truths I've learned about high school. Please keep in mind that some of these aren't Biblical truths or anything like that; they're just practical, obvious, or nonsensical facts of life. Let's get started...

1. Take a walk (duh duh duh duh DUH, duh duuuh duh... only people who listen to Passion Pit will understand that).

Literally, I mean take a walk. If you're having a bad day for any given reason, just get up and move. I know lots of kids who will deal with their troubles by thinking about them repeatedly, listening to music, or writing them down. While all of these things are great, I've found that exercising in some way or form works A LOT better. I don't have a scientific explanation for this even though I know there are lots of them out there; just do it and you'll understand.

2. Realize that most Disney movies are secretly aimed towards high school students. 

There's nothing like sitting down and watching Emperor's New Groove, Lilo and Stitch, or Mulan just for kicks. You'll discover a lot of jokes that you never understood until now. 

3. Be strange and own it.

If you decide in your heart to be tastefully different and do it in an unashamed manner, you will probably find awesome friends. Some of my best high school memories with friends include singing songs from the musical Annie while at the top of a roller coaster, spontaneously dancing in a parking lot at midnight, wearing renaissance clothing to school just because, and having wet napkin-throwing wars with friends in another car while at a stop light. 

It's much more fun than doing whatever normal people do in high school. 

4. Understand that your views of people will change a lot.

Some of my best friends today were some of my greatest annoyances a year or two ago. A few people that I only consider my acquaintances right now were my buddies at the beginning of high school. That's the way it is, so don't put too much weight on your current good friends. Take each moment in your friendships as they come and don't be easily offended. 

5. Understand that people will change a lot. 

The really angelically nice kid you know now could become a jerk by his senior year and the irritating, freshman brat that peeves everyone might just be the coolest girl you've ever known when graduation comes around. Don't ever believe that peoples' behaviors right now are the be all, end all of life. 

6. Understand that friendships shouldn't just be about you. 

This is the application of truths #4 and #5. Because people are constantly changing and your view of them is constantly changing, you will be sorely disappointed if you are only trying to make your own life better through friendships. Instead, see how you can benefit others. How can you INVEST in your current friends? Ask questions during conversations instead of just talking about yourself, pray for your buddies, and do spontaneous things for them. If your friendships aren't just about you, then when your friends mess up or change, you won't be nearly as frustrated with them.

Ecclesiastes 4:9 says, 

"Two people are better off than one, for they can HELP EACH OTHER succeed."

Notice that it doesn't say,

"You are better off with friends because they will make YOUR life better."

It's a two-sided deal. 

7. Invest in people that really matter.

In the summer of 2012, my sophomore year, my parents left for a week-long trip to Bermuda. My brother and I had the opportunity to spend half of the week with some of our good friends that we've known for years and the other half with our grandparents. However, instead of enjoying my time with my brother, my good friend, and my grandparents, I spend a good amount of the week texting some of my friends from school. When I look back on that week, I realize something sad; I don't remember anything that I did with my grandparents or my good friends. The only memories from that week are the text conversations I had with my temporary buddies. Today, I'm not keeping in touch with any of those friends. So, here's my challenge to you: put down your phone for an afternoon and spend time with your siblings. Decide to send a "what's up" text to one of your cousins who lives across the country instead of scrolling down your news feed again. Get in contact with an old friend rather than sending yet another text to that someone that you're temporarily interested in. 

I'm not saying that it's bad to invest in temporary friends. I just think that it's also very important to upkeep friendships and family relationships that really matter. 

8. Stay attentive to God's calling for your life.

You will change a lot during high school. God won't. Malachi 3:6 says this clearly,

"I, the LORD, do not change."

So, keep good habits such as daily devotions. Pray and read your Bible regularly. It's elementary, my dear Watson. By keeping your eyes on God, you won't be so focused on the storm around you. 

9. Don't be a drama queen. 

So many teenagers like to dramatize everything. Don't be that person. If you can appropriately add #firstworldproblem to a description of your current issue, then stop telling everyone about it. 

"Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again- rejoice!"

Philippians 4:4

If Paul could write this during one of his many stays in prison, then there's no doubt that you can be joyful in every situation that life throws at you.

10. Have fun while staying busy. 

Join clubs or teams that allow you to have fun with friends WHILE doing something useful with your life. Marching band did this for me and I absolutely loved being able to spend time with friends at football games, band competitions, car washes, and Dairy Queen visits. It's better to be doing useful things with friends than to just "hang out". Unoccupied idleness is never good in the teenage world. I've seen some of the best, upstanding kids get into trouble, simply because they were bored or restless at unstructured social events or get-togethers.  

So, there they are, the ten things I've learned over the past few years. I'm continuing to learn some of these lessons even now and I hope that we all can continue to take them to heart throughout the rest of our lives- especially #2, because no one is ever too old for Disney. 

Courage, Dear Heart

She wore a yellowed wedding dress and her entire demeanor seemed to represent her lost past. Surrounded by relics of what had never been, her entire life rotted away slowly. The only thing she ever lived for was plotting revenge on other helpless souls, hoping to avenge her own pain and suffering. 

I know, she sounds like a nasty person, doesn't she? 

Well, the character I just described is the main villain in the book Great Expectations by Charles Dickens. Her name is Miss Havisham. 

She was rejected unexpectedly by her fiance. At the last minute, as she was preparing for the wedding, he ran away and eloped with someone else, leaving her with absolutely nothing. Because of this, Miss Havisham became bitter, turning against any forms of happiness or joy. She locked herself in the depths of her house and kept up all of the things from the wedding, allowing them to all slowly rot away. Miss Havisham even adopted a little girl and trained her to purposefully break little boys' hearts, in some form of sick revenge.

Sounds awful, doesn't it?

However, as I read this story, I saw a bit of reality in it. I've met people who hold onto their pain in a similar way, allowing bitterness to rot them away and paralyze them from living life. It makes me especially sad to see Christians like this since their bitterness goes against an amazing promise given to us by Jesus in the book of John:

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. (John 10:10 NIV)"

So in other words, Jesus has given us all we need to live life to the full. But, if we're constantly holding onto our pain and grief from the past, we won't be able to truly move forward and live the life he has planned for us.

This isn't as easy as it may appear; after all, the verse tells us that there is a thief who comes to steal and kill and destroy; he will do everything in his power to steal away our joy. He knows how to whisper lies to us, convincing us that we must dwell on our own pain and suffering. But, God has given each of us a gift to help us battle these attacks: courage. 

The dictionary defines courage as,"strength in the face of pain or grief." 

King David talks about this in Psalm 29:11,

"The Lord gives his people strength. The Lord blesses them with peace."

This whole concept reminds me of another book, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader by C.S. Lewis from the Chronicles of Narnia series.

In one scene of this book, the crew of a ship (the Dawn Treader), must sail into a giant patch of darkness, in search of a man who went missing. This scene used to always scare me as a child, especially since the darkness itself had some magic within it that caused the poor crew to see mirages of the things they feared most. But, after sailing through darkness and fear for quite a while, one of the crew members, a young girl named Lucy, makes a breakthrough. The following passage is especially meaningful to me since an allegorical character representing Jesus, a lion called Aslan, makes an appearance.

"Lucy leant her head on the edge of he fighting top and whispered, "Aslan, Aslan, if ever you loved us at all, send us help now." The darkness did not grow any less, but she began to feel a little- a very, very little- better...

"Look!" cried Rynelf's voice hoarsely from the bows. There was a tiny speck of light ahead, and while they watched a broad beam of light fell from it upon the ship. It did not alter the surrounding darkness, but the whole ship was lit up as if by searchlight...Lucy looked along the beam and presently saw something in it. At first it looked like a cross, then it looked like an aeroplane, then it looked like a kite, and at last with a whirring of wings it was right overhead and was an albatross. It circled three times round the mast and then perched for an instant on the crest of the gilded dragon at the bow. It called out in a strong sweet voice what seemed to be words though no one understood them. After that it spread its wings, rose, and began to fly slowly ahead, bearing a little to starboard...But no one except Lucy knew that as it circled the mast it had whispered to her, "courage, dear heart," and the voice, she felt surer, was Aslan's, and with the voice a delicious smell breathed in her face."

Chapter 12, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader

This passage describes courage in such a profound way. In the midst of darkness and adversity, Lucy called out to Aslan and he answered by whispering, "courage, dear heart."

In the same way, God gives us courage to face our troubles, whether they be big or small.

Over the past two months, I've seen this truth manifested in three of my friends' lives. Adversity hit them in shockingly unexpected ways as both of the families represented by these three friends lost a parent. Seeing their lives get turned upside down in this way made me realize that they have every reason to be bitter and every right to dwell in their grief. However, they have done just the opposite. I've seen each of these friends step up in COURAGE, continuing forward in their faith with strength. In fact, one of my friends told me this in a text only days after his mom passed away:

"God's plans are perfect and wonderful, even if we can't fully understand them at the moment."

Seeing their endurance through these hard weeks made me realize something important; while there is a time to grieve and learn how to live through such events, God didn't intend for us to live in our sufferings. As John 10:10 said, he has given us life to live to the fullest. My pastor actually talked about this a little while ago; he explained that we can either use our hard circumstances to keep us weighed down and lost in adversity or we can let God take the troubles and use them for His glory.

As C.S. Lewis once said,

"hardship often prepares an ordinary person for an extraordinary destiny."

As I look at my three friends' lives and see how their faiths have grown immensely through their courage, I can already tell that God is planning extraordinary destinies for each of them.

The question is, will you let Him do the same for you?

Beware the Wadis

Psalm 23:1-2

“The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.

He makes me lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside quiet waters,

He refreshes my soul.”

I’m sure you, like me, have heard these verses many, many times. I know that whenever I read this passage in the past, I pictured the fluffiest, greenest fields imaginable, something like the rolling hills of Ireland or a nicely-groomed lawn in the late spring...

However, I just learned something very interesting about the actual green pastures in Israel, the ones that inspired David to write this Psalm. They actually looked like this...

 Because about half of Israel is made up of a wilderness region called the Negev, it’s very, very unlikely that David ever laid eyes on a nicely-groomed lawn or a rolling Irish hill. In fact, the shepherds in Israel are constantly on the search to find enough grass for their little sheep to eat. The sheep aren’t swimming in luscious grass all the time as some of us may have previously pictured; they only have just enough for the moment as they are eating. But, all the same, the sheep are never concerned that they’ll starve, even when the land around them may seem barren and lifeless. They “know” (as well as sheep can know) that their shepherd will find them more grass when it’s time to eat again.

I think that this imagery of the “green pastures” in Israel is much more realistic to our own lives. After all, we aren’t surrounded by a luscious green field, always filled with everything we’ll need for life. This is why we need to trust our Shepherd to lead us to what we need, every moment. I know that this may be a hard concept for some of us to swallow, especially those of us who may be thinking about colleges and future plans. Our natural inclination is to try and find tomorrow’s grass today. We want to go forward and form an “eating plan” for ourselves. This can be very dangerous. Let me go back to the Negev to explain why.

Let’s say one of the sheep gets worried that the shepherd won’t lead him to more food when he needs it. He looks around and sees that he and the rest of the flock have just finished off the grass in an area, and now he’s REALLY worried. So, he decides to wander off and find some more food on his own. But, since Israel is a desert, Mr. Sheep runs into an instant problem within half an hour of his excursion; he gets thirsty. The only places to find water in the Negev are in small canals called Wadis. Here's a picture so you can visualize a Wadi...

 Mr. Sheep sees a nice little pool of water in the Wadi and he steps down into the canal to get a long drink. But, unbeknownst to Mr. Sheep, the Wadis in Israel are prone to flash flooding; if a heavy rain comes through some of the mountains surrounding the open fields, water will quickly run down and fill the Wadis within a matter of minutes. So, if Mr. Sheep happens to be inside a Wadi, getting a nice long drink when the flash flood happens, he has a very likely chance of drowning.

However, staying with the shepherd completely prevents this calamity from occurring. By sticking with the rest of the flock and allowing the shepherd to lead them all to water, Mr. Sheep won’t have a chance of drowning. The shepherd himself has something that none of the sheep have; he has FORESIGHT. He realizes that the Wadis can fill up with water and he watches the weather carefully so he can be sure to move his sheep out of the canal and back onto solid land before the flash floods come.

I think this is why verse 2 of Psalm 23 talks about “quiet waters”. I looked up the definition of quiet in the dictionary and it means, “without much activity, disturbance, or excitement”.  I think it’s cool how well that relates to the concept of the Wadis. It can remind us that our own Shepherd has foresight that we could never have. By trusting in Him to provide for our needs in every moment, we are keeping ourselves from the danger that comes with trying to live all on our own.

 To conclude all of this information, I came up with a short blurb to sum all of it up:

“Beware the Wadis;

Don’t look for tomorrow’s grass today because the Shepherd takes care of you in every moment.”

King David said it well, when he wrote Psalm 23, didn’t he?

Atlas

"Every muscle in my body turned to fire. My bones felt like they were melting. I wanted to scream, but I didn't have the strength to open my mouth. I began to sink, lower and lower to the ground, the sky's weight crushing me."
- The Titan's Curse by Rick Riordan, page 269

Atlas was a deity in ancient Greek mythology. He was the god believed to hold up the earth itself, keeping the sky and the sea from melding together and killing all of humanity. In the scene I just quoted, a mortal boy, Percy Jackson, temporarily takes the load of the earth in Atlas's stead to save one of his friends (I won't tell any more; I wouldn't want to spoil the book for you).
Even though the Percy Jackson series is completely based off of pagan gods and whatnot, I was hit very hard by this short description. Somehow, I was able to relate to Percy's plight because I too have tried to carry the weight of my own world all by myself.
Any time we as humans say something like,
"I've got this."
"I have the strength to get through this."
"I can do this on my own",
we are actually saying that we can, in fact, carry the world on our shoulders, all by ourselves. But, just like Percy, we soon realize how excruciating it is to actually hold up the world and keep it from crashing down on us.
I know I've definitely felt this way before. However, I came across a verse in Psalms that addresses this concept perfectly. Because I just got a spectacular copy of the Message Bible as a gift, I've had the chance to read the Bible from an alternate perspective frequently and this verse in particular stood out to me:
"I took the world off your shoulders, freed you from a life of hard labor. You called to me in your pain; I got you out of a bad place."
Psalm 81:6-7a (MSG)
Wow. This verse is so comforting to me. It means that no matter what I may be facing in this life, God will carry it for me. He will bring me through the rough time, holding up my world and preventing me from getting crushed by it.
Another Psalm discusses this some more:
"They did not conquer the land with their swords; it was not their own strong arm that gave them victory. It was your right hand and strong arm and the blinding light from your face that helped them, for you loved them."
Psalm 44:3 (NLT)
To summarize these thoughts, we are not strong enough to hold up our own worlds. That is a fact of life. No matter how hard we try, we CAN'T do it. God is the only one who's strong enough to lift the weight onto His shoulders. So, the next time you feel overwhelmed, don't try and say, "I've got this. I can do it" because honestly and sadly, you can't do it. This is why we need our savior, Jesus Christ, to step in and be our Atlas, holding up the world on his strong shoulders, yet carrying each of us in His loving arms. One of my favorite Coldplay songs, titled "Atlas", reflects this promise,
"Carry your world, I'll carry your world."
And he will carry your world, but only if you place it on His shoulders. You must ALLOW God to take your world and hold it with His strength.
I know that I've quoted a lot of random books and such already, but I came across a beautiful prayer about this topic in a compilation book of Puritan prayers and devotions. So, to end this blog post:
"O Lord of Grace,
The world is before me this day,
 and I am weak and fearful,
but I look to thee for strength;
 if I venture forth alone I stumble and fall,
but on the Beloved's arms I am firm as the eternal hills;
if left to the treachery of my heart I shall shame thy Name,
 but if enlightened, guided, upheld by thy Spirit,
I shall bring thee glory.
Be thou my arm to support,
my strength to stand,
my light to see,
my feet to run,
my shield to protect,
my sword to repel,
my sun to warm."
- "God All-Sufficient" from The Valley of Vision by Arthur Bennett

Something to Read Before Valentine's Day

Our society has messed up ideas of love. I'm sure you've already heard that before now. However, because of all of the jaded views of love floating around in the world, our own Christian community has created their own jaded views of it as well. Sometimes, we as Christians have a bad habit of antagonizing relationships; we start to think of them as off limits and we try to treat our desires for companionship as sins. However, I don't believe that God views love as a bad thing at all. I mean, really, he was the one that invented our desires in the first place! Think about it. He gave Adam a helper for a reason. God realizes that we as human beings need to be known and loved, so he has provided us with these things. But, as we all know well, society has taken this priceless, wonderful gift and smashed it into something meaningless. I think Taylor Swift's song "State of Grace" shows this clearly:

"So you were never a saint

And I’ve loved in shades of wrong

We learn to live with the pain

Mosaic broken hearts

But this love is brave and wild

And I never saw you coming

And I'll never be the same

This is a state of grace

This is the worthwhile fight

Love is a ruthless game

Unless you play it good and right

These are the hands of fate

You're my Achilles heel

This is the golden age of something good and right and real."

Honestly this song isn't blatantly bad. But, it makes me a little sad to see a precious gift given to us by our loving Creator called "a ruthless game" and an "Achille's heel". The general message of this song is about the emptiness and pain that comes with pursuing this world's definition of love. From the melancholy sound of this song to the longing lyrics, Taylor Swift has accurately depicted emotions that resonate with anyone who has experienced the disappointment of worldly love. But what do we do to avoid this unfortunate love?

The answer lies within one the most outlandish and bizarre books of the Bible, Song of Songs. Let me just say that if you want proof that God himself created love and sex, then read this book. However, let me continue...

"Catch all the foxes, those little foxes, before they ruin the vineyard of love, for the grapevines are blossoming!"

Song of Songs 2:15

I first heard this verse when my mom got me a t-shirt with it on it. When I first laid eyes on this shirt, I was very confused. But, she explained the meaning behind it and I realized that this verse is extremely relevant. The foxes are a metaphor for little things that distract us from true love. Not worldly, empty love, but true love-the kind of love described in 1 Corinthians 13. We as Christians need to begin to catch them if we want to experience this love. So, what exactly are the little foxes?

Well, I think they're different in every individual's lives. They could be suggestive songs that propel the imagination, sensual books or movies, a current, unhealthy relationship that you know is wrong, porn, or anything else that turns us away from 1 Corinthians 13 love. These are very hard things to say, yes, but according to King Solomon, if we hold onto our foxes, we'll never truly be able to experience the wonderful kind of love God has created for us. So, here's the food for thought: what are your little foxes and what are you going to do about them? The wonderful thing is, because we have a wonderful God, he can pull out his "fox-whacker" (like a weed-whacker, but it kills foxes instead) and give us a hand in subduing those pests. But the question is, will you let him in to help you deal with them? I hope and pray that you'll think through this as I am thinking through it too. Our Creator has given us a marvelous gift of love to enjoy; how could we waste it by settling for less than the real deal?